Thursday, October 27, 2011

Reunions and the Original "Ric Flair"

Whew!  It has been a whirlwind two weeks.  It started off with my Class Reunion and ended with an environmental conference I attended while performing my duties with the mighty NCDOT.  Let me just say this so there isn't any confusion with the two events...one was fun, the other one almost drove me to grab an icepick and jab it in my temple.  Which means we won't be talking about that environmental conference...unless that is, your desperate to know what constitutes hydric soils in a wetland.  I can guarantee that you will be horizontal and counting sheep within 30 seconds.

Anyways, the South View Senior High School class of 1981 finally had their 30 year reunion.  Yep, we're getting old and I gotta tell ya...it was absolutely a first class event and one that was geared toward making everyone as comfortable as possible without all that stuffiness that usually accompanies events like this...I really had a good time.  It was a BBQ in lieu of the traditional catering and Jimmy Black's pig is possibly the best 'cue I have ever had.  I'd also like to tip my hat to Linda Bunnell Westerberg, Jennifer Johnson and "The Hardest Working Man in Show Business" Joey Hulon, for all the organization and hard work that went into making this very successful.  I think the overall atmosphere led to a lot of interaction that probably wouldn't have happened had it been a sit down formal gathering.

More so than anything, as a demographic such as ours that is about to turn 50, we all just felt a sense of normalcy after hearing all the tales of woe since High School.  Naturally, most from this class are parents and several grandparents. To top it off, I can't begin to tell you how many of us are just thankful to have a JOB!!  Times are tough for everyone and I hope it gets better for our fine class.

We had a strong showing from the 'ole Ashton Forest Neighborhood of Fayetteville.  I'm just amazed at the legacy of that crazy and wonderful 'hood.  It fed into Sherwood Park Elementary School and it's one thing to see just your high school mates after so many years, but some of  these people I can recall from First Grade!  Even our street, Cheltenham Road, brought out myself, naturally, and the still radiant and strikingly beautiful Sanchez sisters, Katrina and Selina, who lived next door to us Laugisch's and across from them, during that era, were the Huskey brothers of which Michael made an appearance at the reunion.

It's not lost on me that I was talking to Katrina and trying to figure out how it was that she could still look like she was 18 years old, when Jeff Albertson, another Ashton Forest Alum, whispered in my ear, "Hey, Michael Huskey just got here.  Didn't you live close to him?" Like the idiot I have proven to be half my life, I interupt the beautiful woman I'm having a conversation with and said, "Excuse me Katrina, It was nice talking to you but I'm going to say hello to Michael."  Considering I hadn't seen him in 30 years, I'm willing to bet, as I was making a bee line for him and had not so many people been there, I would have yelled his name from across the parking lot and knocked him to the ground hugging on him like some horny dog.  I know...too much info Mark. 

You don't understand: This was The MICHAEL HUSKEY.

I'm trying to give you, the reader, a character that you can relate to.  Why not Robin Hood...you ask?  After all, you can make the corelation between Ashton Forest and Sherwood Park, right?  Um...one..it's stupid and two...Michael wasn't exactly a saint growing up and he needs a character to represent him that blurs the line of right and wrong just a little bit.  In fact, I doubt there were many parents on Cheltenham Road who had a kind word to say about him...my folks absolutely despised the guy.  We Laugisch boys, on the other hand... reverred him.

So who compares favorably to Michael that we can all agree upon would do him justice?  There's only one person.  Michael was Ric Flair before anyone in this world had ever heard of him and his patented "Figure Four" wrestling move.  No, no.  Micheal wasn't a professional wrestler.  He probably could have faked his way doing it like most of them do, but he was way too cool back in the day and he just had this certain charisma...like Ric Flair.  As I said earlier, he wasn't a choir boy which is why he is closer in comparrison to the "Nature Boy" than anyone else.  Trouble always followed Michael...in a good way...and for some strange reason he took a liking to us goofy Laugisch boys.

I was ten years old when Dad and the US Army dragged us away from the friendly confines of Ashton Forest and supplanted us in Berlin, Germany.  I would be thirteen upon my return and it's amazing what two and a half years does to a kid and a neighborhood.  We were strangers in a place we thought we were once a part of.  It was Michael Huskey who made us feel welcome and we didn't know why.

Take for instance Halloween...who goes Trick-or-Treating with Fire crackers, a lighter and bags of dog shit?  That's right...Ric Flair.  He'd come get us to play Basketball or Stickball and often we played Football at Sherwood Park Elementary against the GI's.  It never failed, here we were, up against guys five or six years older and damn sure bigger and there's Micheal making sure Fred, Henry and Mark are on his team.  He made us feel like we could beat the Dallas Cowboys and every now and again those GI's left wondering, "What just happened?"...as some loud mouth punk and his three minions made fools of them.  Even in defeat and it happened a lot, Michael would make it interesting.  Knowing we were going to lose he would point out the guy on the other team that was pissing him off that particular day and state that he was going to throw an interception to his nemesis and instructed us to "smear the queer" and hold him as Ric Flair came off the top rope with his patented cheap shot to the ribs.  It sometimes ended in a mele with the GI's chasing us Laugisch's, but to no avail as we knew the neighborhood.  Naturally, and without knowing how, Micheal would always find a way to not get his ass kicked.  

To put it simply, Micheal Huskey, aka...the original...Ric Flair, made life on Cheltenham Road damn interesting and I thank him for that.  It might be another thirty years before I see him again, but I'll bear hug him if given an opportunity and know that, "To be the Man...you got to beat the Man!!  Whoo!!  Rock on Michael...it was damn good seeing you.

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

T-Roy for President...Walking with Grace

It's only a matter of months before our country gets knee deep into the business of electing a new president.  To be quite frank with you, I dread it.  It's not that I don't have a passing interest in who runs our country... "contraire mon fraire"...you can bet your sweet glutimus maximus after the year Ye Old Fat Bastard is having...that I do care who's wasting all my hard earned money that Uncle Sugar takes from me in taxes. It's just that I don't particularly like all the hypocrisy and phoniness of most of the candidates and the fact that we have to endure our leisure time watching all those negative, attacking political adds that leave me mentally fatigued.  We will spend the next year being inundated with commercials and ads that try to convince us, that certain Americans have the right stuff to be POTUS...I don't need that headache.

Being that my political and religious affiliation are one in the same, AMERICAN, I thought I would bring a refreshing, unique and unbiased approach in nominating my own candidate for our country's highest office.  Now, this isn't a "Randy of the Redwoods" type of endorsement.  No...no...no.  I'm deadly serious when I say I want this particular individual to run for president...it's just that he has far more important things to accomplish in the real world that may prevent him from leading our nation out of this current mess we find ourselves in.  My guy is T-Roy, actually it's Troy...I'm the only goofball that calls him T-Roy.

I've known Troy from our time spent working together at the RBC Center as Suite Hosts.  We have had some great times rooting for the Carolina Hurricanes and it was his passion and enthusiasm that made me a certified "Caniac" and fan of hockey.  That magical season in '06 when Rod Brind'mour hoisted up Lord Stanly's BIG ASS CUP will always stand out to me and Troy was there to cherish the excitement and nervous energy of winning a game 7 in what is officially known as the "Loudest House in the NHL."  Man, writing about that event doesn't even come close to actually having been a part of it like we were...truly a great memory.

What makes Troy such a great candidate?  To start, he has all the qualifications such as honor, integrity, passion and loyalty that all Americans want in a president.  I could go down the list as to what makes him "the guy," but you only need to know one thing about Troy.  Shit happens around this man.  I don't mean shit gets done around Troy, although it is a well documented fact that he is a hard worker and probably has 3 part time jobs to go along with his primary gig as a teacher; he's also a wonderful husband and father of two beautiful girls.  I mean literally, shit happens around Troy that defies all reason and logic.  Seriously, this guy can walk into a bar and start a chain reaction so bizarre that the National Guard has to be activated just so Law and Order can be restored.  I'm not trying to imply that Troy is a hard-luck guy and that a rain cloud follows him everywhere he goes...on the contrary, he's popular and well liked...he has such an engaging personality that people feel comfortable around him...and...then strange shit just seems to happen.  There was the time he almost swallowed his uvula, (the bell shaped thing-a-ma-gig that hangs from the roof of your mouth) when he was in the hospital, or the time when we decided on the spur of the moment  to "tailgate" after work with just a six pack of beer.  His Liquor Distributor Neighbor/friend just happens to call and asks Troy to drive his SUV home... to our benefit it's loaded down with booze, steaks and a grill.  You'll be hard pressed to top Troy when he walks in and starts out with, "you won't believe this shit!!"  Troy has "been there and done that" ten times over.  Bad stuff doesn't always happen to Troy...in fact, it usually turns out pretty good.  Which is why this makes him a perfect candidate for President of the USA.

Troy has this uncanny ability to turn everything into a positive experience.  Call it what you want, luck, skill...Johnny on the Spot.  Regardless, he's the right guy for what ails this nation.  Basically we need a "Rabbits Foot."  That's what Troy is.  Troy may not have the support of either the House or the Senate when he's elected but I'm willing to bet that before the session ends he'll have the gallery singing "Lola" in bipartisan harmony. He probably won't have the political savvy or military experience to handle something as easy as invading Mexico, but I guarantee you...it will be one helluva a party and the end result would probably be the Drug Cartels shutting down their drug trade!!  That's how bizarre and wonderful it would turn out. 

There is something else that uniquely qualifies Troy as a bonafied Presidential candidate.  He and his lovely wife Beth, are parents to a child of Special Needs.  Grace, there oldest daughter is autistic.  The wonderful thing about them is that they do not let autism define them as a family.  Strangely, you wouldn't know this about Troy upon meeting him; he's the absolutely most upbeat person I have ever known considering his circumstances.  I'm embarrassed to say that I could never equal his enthusiasm on a day to day basis.  I would dare say that dealing with the travails of the presidency pale in comparison to life in Troy and Beth's home. 

I don't feel sorry for Troy....seriously, I envy the hell out of him, which is why I would walk over hot coals for the guy, but the only thing, outside of an occasional beer, that he's ever asked for, is that I support the charity that directly benefits their child Grace...The Autism Society of North Carolina.  They sponsor a 5k run/walk every year in Raleigh where one of the teams is aptly called, "Walking for Grace."  I can bemoan all the crap that has happened to me this year and I don't have the resources or time to give a lot, but you'll find "The Big Dog" downtown again this year as he runs to support these wonderful people.  I ask all of you to join me...come down and meet Troy and Beth...it's a huge event, a party will definitely break out and I'm sure some galactically cosmic event will take place near the vicinity...don't fret though, it's only Troy...running for president and it's all good.